Dads - What can they do to help teach MFW?

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mlangley
Posts: 18
Joined: Sun Feb 05, 2012 7:41 pm

Re: How or do your husbands help with school?

Unread post by mlangley » Mon Oct 01, 2012 5:08 pm

TriciaMR wrote:As far as school, he is my ear to bounce ideas off of. He pretty much lets me pick curriculum, outside activities, etc. But he sees himself as mostly a provider (making sure we can afford for me to stay home) rather than implementer. He will talk to the kids if we have discipline issues, and does help in that area.
same here!
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Grace Christian Homeschool

Using CTG & AHL with 3 children

Julie in MN
Posts: 2927
Joined: Mon Jun 28, 2004 3:44 pm
Location: Minnesota

Re: How or do your husbands help with school?

Unread post by Julie in MN » Mon Oct 01, 2012 6:12 pm

Here is an old thread, and I notice I posted when my dh was working full-time out of the home:
http://board.mfwbooks.com/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=2014

Here are a few things that dad did at our house as far as schoolwork over the years:
- Bible study as a family in the evenings
- Read-alouds at bedtime
- Lot of phy ed and outside activities
- Extra projects (ds & dh did photography for Christmas presents one year, built a lock-and-dam another year) similar to what a public school dad might do
- "Shop class" in 7-8th grade, which included reading the Created For Work books and some kind of activity (fix the toaster, change a tire, science of cooking, wood and leather crafts, etc.)
- Helped me make choices when I was stuck, from curriculum choices to discipline choices

As for household chores, I asked dh to try to look at homeschooling as if I left the house for "work" each day, and the home would pretty much be in the same condition when he returned in the evening as it was when he left, just as if I had spent the day at a full-time job teaching at the public school or something. The kids and I did try to clean up any messes we caused during the day, but I did not try to mix general housework with homeschooling, because I felt neither would be successful that way. I did try to dig into housework after about 3:30 on the days when I didn't work (I've always worked part-time), but in general, when dh returned home from work, it was as if we were both arriving home from our respective jobs, and we both had to dig into cooking (usually dh did that), picking up (my job), and any other chores that could not wait until Saturday. I also took care of sick kids and midnight awakenings, so dh would get enough rest to drive to work in the morning.

There's one more family for ya - from a mom who's never been capable of doing it all. Dh and I never knew we'd end up homeschooling, but dh knew before we married that parenting would be too important to me to take a sideline to housework :)
Julie

P.S. I think David Hazell has a dad's talk on one of his CDs?
Julie, married 29 yrs, finding our way without Shane
(http://www.CaringBridge.org/visit/ShaneHansell)
Reid (21) college student; used MFW 3rd-12th grades (2004-2014)
Alexandra (29) mother; hs from 10th grade (2002)
Travis (32) engineer; never hs

wisdomschool
Posts: 45
Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2007 4:16 pm

Re: How or do your husbands help with school?

Unread post by wisdomschool » Mon Oct 01, 2012 10:03 pm

My husband is sitting here with me reading this and his comment was "I'm not a very good dad", so I need to brag on him a bit;) though he doesn't actually "teach" a subject or plan etc... he is our "principle" and I do call him during the day for help with children's behaviors!:) He does listen to me, approve curriculum(and pay for it!) and is a huge help with our toddler boys(comes home and changes diapers, gets little boys ready for bed etc....) he cooks some, and helps me keep the kiddos moving/directed on chores and helps check chores.

We have 8 acres and he(with a little help from our oldest son)does all the mowing/weed wacking......he also helps with grocery shopping.

Though I want to only build him up and say wonderful things about him, I will say(as I know he would too) that over the years he has "had" to help more as more and more children have come along......we have 7 children and our oldest will just be 12 this month. Also, when my husband used to work a minimum of 6 full days a week he didn't do as much, and he really didn't "help" with the kids(like he does now) or shop or cook until we had several children....

The thing I currently like the most is that he writes a scripture verse(minus the reference)on our white board in the early mornings before he goes to work for our two oldest to use the concordance to find the reference to-such good skills for them to learn!

Even when my husband didn't "do" as much to help me at home/with the teaching/participate in their schooling as he does now, I have always built him up to our children and my friends(not making things up to make him "sound good", but seeking out/speaking out the good in him)it is very important for you to be able to talk with your husband and share what is hard for you/ask for help, but also try to build him up-let him know what you appreciate about him, and pray-God hears you and cares even if you feel alone and needing help. And we here are happy to listen:)

Many blessings to you and thank you everyone for listening to me share about my guy a little:)
Momma & Teacher to my super seven:

Kanen-6th
Abia-4th
Charis-3rd
Tobias-1st
Elijah-3 y.o.
Micah-2 y.o.
Eden-3 mo.

Melany
Posts: 8
Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2011 9:04 am

Re: How or do your husbands help with school?

Unread post by Melany » Tue Oct 02, 2012 12:19 pm

Thank you so much for your replies.

I have been feeling a bit frustrated with dh and actually reading through your replies reminded me of the many things dh does do to help out. I think I need to make myself up a list and have it close at hand for those days that I'm feeling like it is ALL up to me to do. He really does help out a lot! :)

momtogc
Posts: 78
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2007 11:25 pm
Location: AR

Re: How or do your husbands help with school?

Unread post by momtogc » Tue Oct 02, 2012 5:32 pm

My dh is a lot like the other HS Dads mentioned here. He works, of course, takes care of the yard, and he will do inside house maintenance. He also does some major things like cooking our weekday dinners and buying weekly groceries. He likes doing those things and I don't so it's a great tradeoff! He always says we would starve if I had to cook - - he's probably right. lol (I do the kitchen clean up most nights.) He also helps a little bit with laundry by washing towels.

As for actual school stuff, he picks up whatever supplies we need for the week when he's at the grocery store. He grades math, too. My dd puts her math work in his Inbox on our desk, and he grades it and goes over problems with her after dinner. I love that he's involved in that. He's really good at math and can sometimes explain things to her in a way that makes more sense than the way I explain them.

Occasionally he has helped us with a science project. I usually save those for the weekend when he has more time.

Thanks for helping me to look at the big picture and see how much he does for us! :-) :-)
Mom to Gabi, a fun-loving and happy girl!
MFW 1st, Adventures, ECC, CTG, RTR, Exp-1850

HeyChelle
Posts: 58
Joined: Mon Jul 26, 2010 6:51 pm

Re: How or do your husbands help with school?

Unread post by HeyChelle » Wed Oct 03, 2012 3:06 pm

I tell him how much money I want for field trips, curriculum, books, etc., and he hands over the money.

Other than that he fulfills his roll as an awesome husband and dad.
All the formal schooling is on me.
Chelle - Christian, wife, and mommy of 4
My family/homeschooling blog

Yodergoat
Posts: 243
Joined: Thu Jun 09, 2011 2:14 pm

Encouraged by an ice storm!

Unread post by Yodergoat » Wed Mar 05, 2014 8:16 pm

We've had a major (for us) ice storm here in Tennessee, leaving my husband unable to get to work. We live on a very rural dead end road. :~

Anyway, my husband has been off work since lunchtime on Saturday. We don't do school when he is home, but we needed to do it to stay on schedule and I think he wanted a glimpse into how our days actually go. I felt myself unexpectedly nervous... we're doing Adventures and he hadn't seen us doing school since Kindergarten (and that was M-m-moon)! Would he think we do enough? Would Gail act differently? Would it be a disaster and leave a (false) bad impression on him? He is 100% on board with homeschooling and a great advocate and encourager, but I was worried that he might somehow think my teaching or the curriculum was lacking. You know how you can doubt yourself.

But, it went delightfully! He said he enjoyed seeing what we do, and he liked participating in an experiment we did. He now has a better understanding now of how our days go, and has gotten a closer look at some of the materials. He found it exciting that his own personal Bible reading had aspects of the name of Jesus that Gail is studying, and he has a better respect for the Singapore math methods after seeing us working in the book. He is very mathy, more so than anyone else I know "in real life," and if he says it is good it must be good! During the history portion, he says he learned more about Robert Fulton than he had ever known before. I think also that he now has a better idea of how it is to be home 24/7 with an only child who talks absolutely incessantly. Of course he has spent time off before, but never with this enforced inactivity and feeling of being homebound.

Instead of being nervous, I ended up being very encouraged by his presence!
I'm Shawna...
... a forgiven child of God since 1994 (age 16)
... happily wed to William since 1996
... mother of our long-awaited Gail (3/15/2006)
... missing 6 little ones (4 miscarriages, 2 ectopics)
... starting Rome to the Reformation this fall!

Julie in MN
Posts: 2927
Joined: Mon Jun 28, 2004 3:44 pm
Location: Minnesota

Re: Encouraged by an ice storm!

Unread post by Julie in MN » Fri Mar 07, 2014 10:35 am

Shawna,
What a great encouragement, and so honest :)

I'm so glad your dh became closer to your homeschool, and especially that you wrote down this gem. I just was encouraged to read the ideas boards after reading Kelly's post about them, and I noticed some gems about my dh getting involved in our history studies a bit. I plan to send some of those stories to my son, to show him things he's likely forgotten about dad and homeschool. It's such a treasure to bring our families together through these shared experiences learning together.

Thanks for a fun reason to like storms!
Julie
Julie, married 29 yrs, finding our way without Shane
(http://www.CaringBridge.org/visit/ShaneHansell)
Reid (21) college student; used MFW 3rd-12th grades (2004-2014)
Alexandra (29) mother; hs from 10th grade (2002)
Travis (32) engineer; never hs

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